"Possibly a New Species"
They
are referred to as ghomo slackass-erectush created by natural genetic
downward evolution through constant spineless posturing and spasmodic
upper limb gestures, which new
research has shown to cause shorter legs and an inability to ambulate
other than in an awkward shuffling gait. The "drag-crotch" shape also
seems to effect brain function. Expect no eye contact or intelligent
verbal communication. History shows that this
species mostly receives food stamps, full government care and access to
free institutional housing. Unfortunately, most are highly fertile and
‘at-large’.
