OFF THE WIRE
A pirate walked into a bar, and the bartender said, “Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible.” “What do you mean?” said the pirate, “I feel fine.”
“What about the wooden leg? … You didn’t have that before.” “Well,” said the pirate, “We were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I’m fine now.”
The bartender replied, “Well, OK, but what about that hook? … What happened to your hand?” The pirate explained, “We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but I’m fine, really..”
“What about that eye patch?” “Oh,” said the pirate, “One day we were at sea, and a flock of birds flew over … I looked up, and one of them sh_t in my eye. “You’re kidding,” said the bartender. “You couldn’t lose an eye just from bird sh_t.” “Well It was my first day with the hook” …
